What is Violence?

I am so sorry to hear that you have been hurt. What probably hurts even more is that the damage is coming from the person you love, or thought you loved.

If you believe that you are in danger right now, please call the police (in most areas, dial 911) immediately. If you are being attacked, protect your head and abdomen by curling up and placing your hands over your head, yelling loudly and continuously while being hit.

If you think you are safe at the moment, your best bet is to get some face-to-face help.

Again, the reason for this recommendation is that I want to make sure that you receive the best help possible. And in situations that involve violence, the best help is from someone who can sit down with you face-to-face.

I would be glad to give you some tips on finding a face-to-face counsellor.

If you are a woman living in the Lower Mainland of British Columbia, there is an excellent program you may be interested in. Click here to find out about the program called "Reclaiming Self: Healing from Abusive Relationships."

Safety Plan

1. Prepare a safety bag to keep hidden in a secure place (e.g., friend). This bag should contain:
   • clothing for you and the children
   • cash for taxi and phone calls
   • important phone numbers
   • photocopies of important documents like passports, visas, immigration papers, birth certificates, marriage license, bank books, and insurance papers
2. Save money for an emergency and keep it in a safe place.
3. Keep a diary; note that it may be used in court later. Preserve evidence: apology notes, threatening letters, etc. Note doctors who have treated you for injuries.
4. Consult a lawyer; know your rights.
5. Find a counsellor who will help you build your confidence and inform you about local resources.
6. Teach the children to call 911 in an emergency. This is an important skill for their safety.
7. Alert neighbours to call police if they hear a fight.